WELL WISHER’S GUIDE TO CANDIDATES: Skip politically pregnant questions!

18557048_10209195716116269_6372601876649080369_nBy Jon Pen de Ngong

This is the month of examinations. To all exams candidates in Kenya, Uganda, South Sudan and other countries with chaos in November and December, I wish you a resounding SUCCESS in your examinations in Jesus’s name.

CAUTION: Your Kenyan examination papers will be marked by a machine, not because the teachers are on strike but because Matiang’i and parents do not want cheating. However, Jubilee government is yet to convince many how they are going to avoid ‘Vifarang ya Kompyuta’ (computer-generated generation of intellectuals) like Raila Odinga would put it of leaders.

Therefore, pray not only for your answers but also for your examiners (markers), the machine, lest they are hacked: God forbid!

Secondly, avoid answering politically pregnant questions directly…! You those doing social studies or political studies, don’t say I didn’t tell you, ooh!

Nota Bene (NB): If you come across a question that asks, “WHO IS THE NEW PRESIDENT OF KENYA?”, please, skip it right away. That is a killer question with 3 possible answers, both Right and Wrong: Yesterday, Today and Tomorrow!

1505362_10201365341401795_2001625802_nRemember, the examiner is not KNEB/UNEB but IEBC, Supreme Court and JubiNasa Parties. Plus, your answer sheet may land in the hand of a NASA supporter teacher, and will turn it into an answer sh*t!

In Uganda and South Sudan, you know what questions are dangerous. For example, if you spot a question with names like Kizza Besigye, Riek Machar, Raila Odinga, don’t touch them not very carefully. They carry political virus, especially those whose exam markers are humans. And remember, man is a political animal. I am serious, ohohoh…!

Don’t say I didn’t tell you, ooh!

***

Jon Pen is a South Sudanese writer, poet, journalist activist and a blogger at http://www.weakleak.wordpress.com 

NB: The views expressed in this piece are not necessarily those of AFTABOSS Internet’ional association. 

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